Thursday, October 22, 2015

Midnight Critters

Last night I was awakened from my deep beauty sleep (which consists of one of my arms and legs hanging off the side of the bed {I am a dream bed partner because I am NOT a bed hog, I literally hang off the side of the bed all night long no matter how big the bed is, & how cold it is}, face smashed in my pillow and snoring like a bulldog with a sinus infection. Hey I have a deviated septum okay!) to T asking me where all the flashlights were.

Me- "Uh flashlights? It's the middle of the night! There is one behind my mirror."

T- "Behind your mirror? (As he is looking in my medicine cabinet. To be fair, it is a mirror so I guess that is    technically looking behind a mirror.)

Me- "Not that mirror, my big mirror (getting kinda grouchy now).

T- "Why do you keep a giant spot light for boating behind your mirror"?

Me- "You never know"!

T- "Can you come outside with me, there is a critter out by the trashcans".

Me- "Are you effing serious right now? Does it have a key to the house? Is he threatening our children's lives"? Oh wait, that's what I wanted to say. But I really said, "what kind of critter"?

T- "I don't know, grab a broom".

Okay, now I guess this is where growing up in the country differs from not growing up in the country. If I woke up every time I "heard" a critter outside my window, I would never have slept. I had a family of raccoons live in the avocado tree outside my bedroom window, we had a family of possums' living in our attic until we found where they were getting in (BTW they sounded like horses running around up there above my bedroom), we had coyotes cruise around the house looking for tasty cats all the time, wild peacocks strutting in our garage (our neighbor actually got attacked by one and it ripped the whole side of his leg open), snakes living under the outside steps, families of owls that dropped left over carcasses on our driveway when they were done eating whatever rodent they had found for dinner, okay I think you get the picture.... Anyway, this is why I grabbed the broom, started moving the trashcans and started talking to whatever creature was trying to make a home back there. "Hey little guy, can you come out so I can go back to sleep"?

T- "What if it's a bat"?

Me- "It's not a bat! But that would be awesome! (I love bats!) It's probably a rat or a mouse"

T- "What's a slouse?"


T- "What if it has rabies"?

Me- "It doesn't have rabies"!

T- "How do you know"?

Me- "I haven't heard anyone post or talk about any rabid rodents around the area".

That's when Tony spotted the "critter". It was a big ol' rat. Trying to make a home out of Hunter's shedded hair and some dried grass that missed the trashcan. Poor guy, we interrupted him. I kind of felt bad. Now this is why I love Tony (well not the only reason obviously) but I think most guys would smash the rat or kill the rat. Tony moves all the stuff so he has a way to get out and so that he can't hide anymore and says...

T- "Let's let him leave on his own, he can't hide anymore. I feel like that's the nicest thing to do and we'll check in the morning".

Anyway, I walked back in to the house, put my ginormous spot light back behind my mirror and crawled back on to the edge of my bed and fell back to sleep before T even made it back inside.

Since T get's up super early for work, he let me know that sure enough, Mr. Rat had packed his bags and was gone this morning. Probably headed over to Kami's house ;) It's okay Kami, he brought his teddy bear.

No comments:

Post a Comment