Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Keep Your Sick Kid Home!!!!!

Oh good news... I don't have MRSA of the nostril aaaaaand the antibiotics are working very well! Phew! Also I think I will try waxing my nose hairs next time. If you really care about my nose hair removal method.

On to my rant...

Okay, if my child barfed in class, I sure would NOT send him to school the next day! Okay, let me back up and break this down. There was that one time that "K" barfed in the truck when he was like 3 years old because he was trying to eat a candy cane with the wrapper on and the plastic made him puke... (which is funny because he was also the kid that ate his cupcake at his 2nd birthday with the foil wrapper still on. I should probably have watched him eat things more carefully, but come on, he was 2 and 3 at the time.). If it was a case like that, of course I would send him to school the next day!!!! Buuuuut, if a few kids and the teacher are out due to the flu (hehe that totally rhymed and made me laugh while reading this in my head), then when your kid barfs, I bet he's not eating a plastic covered candy cane, he probably has the flu! SO KEEEEEEP HIM HOME!!!!!!!!!!!  Please go back and read that part in a growly satan beast voice (I feel it adds to the effectiveness)!

I understand that parents work. I understand that it's probably really hard for some parents to call in and explain that their child is sick and they have to stay home with them but unless this is a case where you are seriously on the verge of getting canned (if this is a case like that then I really feel bad and I am sorry for judging you), please keep your barfy, germy child home! If you are just sending him to school so you can watch Days of Our Lives in peace and quiet, then you have a whole new set of problems and I hope you get barf on your couch! Here is why you need to keep your child home...

#1. The rest of the class does not want to get sick!!!! It's already hard enough to keep germs away when I am sure kids don't really wash their hands at school, and they touch everything! In fact, I watched a little girl sneeze a rat sized snot ball this morning while she was standing in line to go to class and then proceed to panic and wipe it on her shirt (yes, I saw you even though you didn't think anyone was watching). Again, I am assuming... but I am pretty confident that she didn't run to the sink right after that and wash her hands with soap and water. And if she did, again... I apologize.

#2. If your kid is barfy... they probably feel like crap and the last place they want to be is school. They probably want to be sleeping all snuggled up with their cat on their pillow smashing their face, their dog tucked in to their back and their blankie all bunched up under their cheek. Oh wait, that's me! But really... if your kid doesn't feel good, they really aren't going to learn anything at school. So you are not helping them at all. Just keep them home and email the teacher for their assignment.

I'll let it slide this time sick kid's mom. But let this be known, if it happens again.... or if my kid comes home puking for any reason other than eating cupcake or candy cane wrappers again (I really hope he's learned his lesson), then I may dress up like an old crazy village person (not the "Village People") with a torch and pitchfork and show up on your lawn.

-Kellee Out

I realize I will probably be asked to leave the school PTA and to step down as room mom after this rant.

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